When our children have nightmares or the fearsome appear night terrors We all had a bad time. Are they negative for our children? Do they suffer as much as it seems? The reality is that no matter how terrible they may seem, they don't leave a "mark." We tell you what night terrors and nightmares really are and What can we do if they appear.
Night terrors or nightmares?
The first thing is to have clear concepts, because one thing is nightmares and another night terrors. Let's look at the characteristics of each one:
Nightmares:
- They are dreams that generate a lot anguish.
- They usually appear (approximately) in the second half of the night.
- The child can move in bed and even make noises while dreaming.
- You can wake easily.
- The "bad time" can last even when they are awake.
Night terrors:
- They are dreams that generate great discomfort, anguish and even terror.
- They usually occur in the first hour after falling asleep (or in the first part of the night).
- The child moves a lot, can even get up while asleep (so there is a risk of being hit).
- Shouts often appear, talk or cry.
- There is a palpable physical activation: sweats, rapid breathing ...
- It turns out very hard to wake up To the child, almost impossible.
- When the child wakes up don't remember anything of what was happening / dreaming.
That is, nightmares are somewhat less "spectacular" in terms of the child's movement, and we can wake him up, while in the case of night terrors this is much more "scandalous" and it is also very difficult to get him out of sleep.
Causes of night terrors
The truth is that there is no single cause clear behind night terrors. Some experts indicate that its appearance is due to own maturation process from children's brains, they would be something like nighttime readjustments. Variables such as stress, having a fever ... are also usually contemplated ... The point is that as they appear then they disappear.
The appearance of nightmares It is usually due to something that has generated concern or anguish for the child in the previous hours or days: a conversation he has heard, a bad experience at school, something he has seen on TV ... Obviously stress or pressure can favor appearance of nightmares (an exam, an important event, a quarrel of dad or mom ...)
Do they have negative consequences?
The important thing, and that is what we should stay with, is that despite how much they seem to suffer, despite how bad it seems to happen during night terrors, they then they won't remember anything, so input, calm in this regard.
Yes we have to keep in mind that with the agitation of the terrors it is possible that they are harmed (with the bed, for example), so we must put on protections to avoid it. Cushions between the bed and the wall or headboard, for example, can prevent them from bumping into it and getting hurt.
In the case of nightmares (when we talk about sporadic appearance or a particular streak) there are no negative effects beyond the discomfort caused by the dream itself.
What can we do to prevent its appearance?
Under normal conditions, without any particularly stressful event such as a divorce, a death in the family or something clear and obvious that may have influenced the child, the general recommendation is to reduce the child's stress level. For this we can:
- Reduce the exciting elementss or that require a lot of activity in hours close to going to bed.
- Reduce the “burden” of the child a little: sometimes we do not realize the amount of things they “have” to do daily, between school, extracurricular ... It may be too much.
- Encourage the little one express your negative emotions During the day, in this way you will release tensions and arrive more relaxed and with less "emotional weight" to bed.
- Avoid abundant dinners or lie down after dinner.
- Do a relaxing activity before going to sleep: read a story, take breaths ...
- Control the temperature of the room and the bedding: sometimes an excess of temperature can trigger nightmares (in children and adults).
- Observe and control what you see in television/ computer / tablet during the day to prevent them from having access to inappropriate content or that could be “nightmare material”.
What do we do if our child has nightmares?
- As I said, nightmares have an unpleasant emotional component, and they do remember them when they wake up, so that it suits them to calm them down, for example with a hug, or speaking to them in a calm and affectionate voice.
- Precisely because they remember the content and may be "affected" after a while after waking up, they may need to talk about it and they may like to clarify their fears. Listen and calm down.
- It is not necessary to turn on the light, even if it is our first impulse, since with this we are transmitting the message that the darkness is bad, and we may reinforce the fear of it.
What if he has night terrors?
- Not try to wake him up, because as I said before it is very difficult. In addition, since they are episodes of high activation, it may be somewhat aggressive (not consciously)
- Put protections on the bed to avoid being hit.
- Remember at all times that they do not suffer, although it seems, and much: they will not remember any of this when you wake up.
- Control our concern and how we deal with the issue before the child: we should try not to be too alarmed during the day or when we talk about it, since this can make the child himself more important and worry more (with what his level of stress will increase).
- Sometimes it is possible that by talking calmly this will relax them in dreams, you can try if it is your case.
Despite the “spectacular” of the Night terrors do not have great negative consequences on children, as well as the appearance of nightmares sporadically. In any case, if you think your child shows this type of dreams due to a stressful event or a high level of stress, it is best that consult with a professionall that I can advise you in a personalized and concrete way. In case it is simply a streak ... mood and calm, it will pass.
Photos: Pexels.com, Wikipedia.
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