In Babies and more we always defend a style of education for children that could be called parenting with respect, with attachment, natural or similar, when considering that children need to feel heard and respected, loved and accompanied, in order to grow and develop so that they are respectful of others, close, humble and kind.
Coming as we come from a generation in which children were taught things based on negative conditions: punishments, cheeks, shouts or threats when they did something wrong, so that they would not do it again, it is very difficult to change the mentality of many people and it is hard for them to understand that for a child not to hit, you don't have to hit him, that for a child to be respectful, you have to respect him, and that for a child to be able to love, he must feel loved.
And it costs even more when they invite a couple to TV to talk about their parenting philosophy, similar to the one we defend here in some places, and the boy jumps on the couch without anyone telling you anything and the girl urinates in the middle of the set, while the mother explains that she does not take them to school, that she breastfeeds them both, that she does not take them to the doctor, that they have never taken a medicine and that if they had cancer, she would give them natural remedies.
The story of Adele and Matt Allen
Adele and Matt are a couple of British parents who decided to take their children's education to a point as natural as possible, in what they call "be out of network". Something like leaving themselves from society and at the same time taking out their children, to do everything in a very different way.
Adele breastfeeds her two children: Ulises, five, and Ostara, one. When she gave birth to her children, as we read in Daily Mail, she decided do not separate the placenta from your babies, letting it stop beating on its own and, after the birth of the placenta, accompany its children to the natural separation of it. Until then, he carried the placenta in a bag, with salt and rose petals, to neutralize the bad smell. It is what is known as childbirth lotus.
He breastfed his eldest son, and at birth the little one followed, so that now both take breast. They chose not to school their children, so although many children of Ulysses' age already go to school, he does not, he will not. Further, they have never gone to the doctor and they have never given them any syrup: if they have any problem like conjunctivitis she puts them breast milk, and if they catch a cold, she gives them lemon juice. All natural remedies that are what you would use if you had a more important disease, such as cancer.
At home they don't have too many rules either. Children do not have schedules and go to bed when they want, because they trust their ability to regulate sleep and wakefulness. So, when they were invited to the television, the viewers were baited with them when they saw that the boy was jumping on the couch and neither of them said anything and the girl was peeing on the floor and there seemed no reaction of apology by the father or the mother.
When they tell me that I'm unconscious for raising my children like that
I guess they went to television to try to normalize their educational style, perhaps to try to open the eyes of others. What they got is a deep rejection, because as Carl Sagan said: "Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence." If you postulate that the best thing for the children is that the children receive an education without rules, routines or schedules and you go to the TV to prove it, the spectators hope to see why it is better to do so.
They wanted to see two children behaving exceptionally, and it didn't. It didn't happen because they did what normal children do: Do not understand what they were doing there and try to find a way to find a minimum of fun. The problem is that the girl had an escape in the middle of the set (because she doesn't have a diaper) and the boy came to jump on the couch, and there nobody said anything.
I can understand that at home the girl can pee anywhere and I can understand that the boy can jump on the sofa in his house and in his bed, if his parents think it is right. Mine have always jumped on the couch, for example. But I can't understand that, being in a foreign place, with unknown people, don't put a diaper on the girl to prevent him from urinating there and that don't tell the child that you can't jump on that couch, because we must respect the property of others.
In other words, many times I have been told that I am unconscious for raising my children as I do, I suppose that because they think that by not hitting or punishing them I leave them with total freedom to do what they think is best when it seems best. And this is not so. I agree in many ways with the way of raising this couple: it seems to me as normal to breastfeed both of us, and for a five-year-old child to still breastfeed; it seems to me as normal that they defend a respectful parenting style towards their children; I find it totally respectable that they have decided to educate them at home. However, I see no sense in treating your children with respect and not teach them that they also have to respect others.
With regard to never taking them to the doctor, just wish you always have good health. Because they take something serious they might regret, they are not the first to try to cure an infection with natural remedies and the thing escapes from their hands.
Photos | DailyMail
In Babies and more | Is there the Natural Aging pack: natural childbirth, colecho, no vaccinations, portage and breastfeeding on demand? (I) and (II), Natural parenting, free advice and how parents who grow up with attachment (I) and (II) evolve
